Meerut28 minutes agoWriter: Shalu Agarwal
Nirmala (name changed), 20 years old, is the eldest of 5 sisters. His parents wished that they should have a son, who could carry on their lineage. Many times his eyes used to fill in the sorrow of not having a son. Eventually Nirmala decided to relieve her pain and got her identity changed 10 days ago.
In Meerut’s Sardar Vallabhbhai Patel Medical Hospital, Nirmala has made herself a boy by doing a gender change.
‘I didn’t want the family to break up, so I became a boy’
She says, ‘Being the eldest of the sisters, it has been my duty to take care of every responsibility of the house. That’s why I had to change my identity. I did not want our laughing and playing family to be scattered or broken. Then I had to leave the girl’s body and become a boy. Of course I was born a girl, but now I have to kill the girl of body and mind and live like a boy. I am happy because today my parents have got a son and my sisters have got a brother.
Before you read the story of Nirmala further, before that, definitely tell your opinion on this issue.
Said to friends- ‘Give me your brother’
Nirmala says, every time sister was born in my house, brother did not come. People used to call us a burden by talking about dowry. If someone says that the dynasty will not run, then the parents would be very sad because they had to listen to the taunts of the society. Relatives also came home and taunted the mother. It was fine till the taunts, but when the talk of Papa’s second marriage started happening in the house, then my fear started increasing. Mother and all of us sisters would be scared by these things.
I used to think that if my father left us, where would we go? How will we live, but father loves us very much. That’s why he never listened to anyone. We sisters also prayed to God day and night that a brother should come to our house. I also asked my friends to give their brother to me. Searched in many institutions, somewhere a son could be found by the parents, but it did not happen.
Mommy didn’t get taunted so used to live like boys
Nirmala says- Seeing my mother repeatedly crying for the boy, I thought that I would be the son of the house. I will make up for the lack of a son in my house. So from childhood I started living like a boy. Of course I had a girl’s body, but I molded myself like a boy. Never wear girls’ clothes, never make hair long. Younger sisters tied rakhi to me and started calling me brother.
Only half a son could be made from the dress, now it has become complete.
I became like a boy by changing my dress, gait, working for boys in the house, tying rakhis to sisters. But there was something missing in that too. So about a year and a half ago I was diagnosed with gender change surgery. One day my parents decided that now I will be a complete son.
I myself told my parents about it, at first they denied. Said that, this is wrong, we cannot lose you. Then I said, I still live like a boy, what is the harm in becoming a complete boy. After many days of conversation, the parents understood, the three of us took the decision to change my gender and got this surgery done with the permission of the administration. Now I am a complete boy, and the only son of my family.
Gender changed when nothing is understood – father
The girl’s father says that everyone loves his son. We never thought that our daughter’s gender would have to be changed. There was no way to get a son, then took this step. We took a chance for a son but every time a daughter happened. I have 5 daughters. It was also wrong to have more children than this. Relatives contacted the orphanage, acquaintance, somehow the son could be adopted, but no boy would adopt. Daughters are always thrown in the garbage too, have you ever heard that a boy was found lying in the bushes somewhere. Boys are never found unclaimed, only daughters are found. When nothing was suggested from anywhere, it was decided to change the gender.
Became a boy but will never be a father
The process of making a boy from a girl in the hospital took about 5 months. For 4 months, doctors gave hormone change medicines to change from girl to boy. So that he can get a beard and mustache, the voice of men can come out. Counseling is being done for 5 months to accept the change from girl to boy.
After hormone change, the girl underwent gender-changing surgery. In the 8-hour surgery, with the help of the thick skin and veins of his left hand, the genitals of the boys have been made and implanted in it. However, hormone change drugs will continue to run. Doctors say that she has become a girl but she will never have a child.
Note: Due to social ethics, here we have kept the girl’s name, address, father’s name secret, (Vinod) fictitious names.